How it all Started – Part 1


I remember it so vividly – I was at work on March 31st, 2011, and felt a pain in my left breast when I turned to work on my computer. The pain itself wasn’t so unusual, my chest used to get sore prior to my period.  I didn’t think too much about it.  When I went home and was getting changed for bed, I was still feeling the pain, so I instinctively touched where it hurt, and to my shock, I felt a lump.  It was the size of a big marble, and I had no idea when it had sprung up.  I was worried, but secretly hoped that I would wake up in the morning and it would magically be gone. I didn’t mention it to my partner.

The next morning, I woke to find that the lump had not magically disappeared.  This time, I did mention it to my partner and decided that I should go my doctor and check it out that day.  I was concerned, but didn’t want to think the worst.  I couldn’t get in to see my doctor until that afternoon, and, when I did, they all assured me that I shouldn’t worry, it was probably nothing.  My doctor said that, the nurse, even the female physician’s assistant who examined me and felt the lump.  They all said not to worry, except for the ultrasound technician and her supervisor, who were quite alarmed when they did the scan.  “You’ve never noticed these before?” the supervisor asked in a very ominous tone.  These?!  “Yes, there’s a lump here and another one here”.  Oh crap, I thought.  No, I had never noticed “them” before.  He asked me, almost accusingly I thought, when was the last time I had a mammogram and really, had I never noticed them before?  Ok, time to worry.  It was almost closing time for the office and the ultrasound supervisor told me not to leave the building without the disc of my ultrasound.  He told his staff to make sure I didn’t leave without the disc of my ultrasound. He definitely sounded worried.  On my way out, my doctor told me again, not to worry, that most likely they were benign cysts that were a result of bumping into things (with my breasts, really?)  or picking up the kids and having them bump into me (more plausible, I thought).  I was sent off to do a mammogram.  Of course, it was a Thursday when this happened and I couldn’t get an appointment until the following week, so I had all weekend to freak out about what was possibly happening.  Over that weekend, I felt another lump under my arm, and I knew something was really, really wrong. 

Next, Part 2 – The Waiting Game

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