Journal entry: July 24th, 2011 (part 1)

Had my 3rd chemo Monday. Side effects started sooner and were a little worse than previous. I’m getting nauseous now -the pills help a lot, thank goodness.  Been tired and wiped out, achey and alternate between being constipated and the opposite.  The sleeping pills have been helping, but I usually can’t sleep past 5 am. At least I’m pretty much sleeping through the night now.  Was real shakey the first couple of days – like there was way too much medicine running through my little body. Oh, that’s right – there is! 

Jada’s birthday is coming up – she’ll be 6 years old.  She told me the other day that she had bad dreams about me and Zetti – that she’d never see us again.  She started crying during a movie because she was afraid I would leave her like someone in the movie left their family.  I think she’s really scared about me being sick and I wish there was more I could do to make her feel better. I wonder how this experience is going to affect her in the long run – how it will – or won’t – impact her life.   I hope she can learn good things from it and how to be a strong and positive child/person.

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